Death Cab for Cutie at Berkeley - Transatlanticism

should I keep updating this? have my blogs fallen victim to myspace? I prefer it not to.

in case you don't already know, please check out the greatest band in the world...

go to http://www.myspace.com/norwegianemocore

ok...
"I have fell victim to you
Troubles I have seen many years
From high windows I have called you
So come save me from this fire



Forget all who hurt you, they don't know you
Come rest your tired body in my arms
From the bedroom I have called you
So come save me from this fire



And I have bad dreams
Done so many bad things
So come save me from this fire"



"Bad Dreams"
-Damien Jurado






Do you ever stop to think that many people come to their crossroads in life and that they just stay there and wonder about what to do? If the crossroads was a physical location, it would be a metropolis of people who stayed because either what they wanted to do- they did or could not, or either because they have no idea what they wanted to do. I really feel for those around me right now, there is so much indecision and uncertainty in the lives of many that I love and care for. When our pillars and our foundations are shaken, we question. Does our faith affect our humanity or does our humanity affect our faith? The reason I ask this is because we get so shaken from the things around us, that it makes me wonder is we put our faith (which doesn't necessarily have to a spiritual one) in things or ideas that are in these cross roads. Foundations and pillars we create will crumble with time. It's a part of life.



So when we come to these crossroads and stay, why? Is it because we have failed and remain content in where we are since others are there? Is it because we are too afraid to leave this place that we know and take the unknown road? Is it because we don't have those pillars to push us through?



What is our release? What then shall take us away from this? This doesn't have to be a permanent one, but something that just makes you feel good enough to know that even though you may not be completely where you want to be, that you will be okay regardless of your dislikes or fears. The release is doing or recieving something that is good enough to release what indecision and uncertainty intend to put on you, but still know that you are there. Not becoming content, but being okay with being aware. Create, strive, dream, and don't ever forget who you are.



-In Almost Famous, Lester Bangs (the legendary rock writer, as portrayed by Phillip Seymour Hoffman) tells William (the protaganist and young aspiring writer) that "The only true currency in this bankrupt world is what you share with someone else when you're uncool", and I think that is very true.



We can't keep it inside, because if you do, it just builds. I wonder about those guys who go nuts that everyone thought to be these normal people. Where they made to be crazy? Did they not see the change?



In many ways, insanity is repeating the same thing over and over again expecting a different result. Is not getting these things outside, by very definition therefore insanity? Do people who just keep it all in justify and expect a change to come because it's deserved? It is a horrible self-destructive cycle, a cycle that I can say that I have been on before in the past. This does no good but to only fuel our implosive nature. We have created this dual nature in ourselves where we all have our own destructive nature, a dichotomy that can prove to be deadly (moreso in a non-literal sense), if we do not find release.



My brothers and sisters, I love and care about you, please find release. Find what it is that frees you.



For those of you who just skipped through my whole rant, pull a Happy Gilmore and find your "Happy Place".



I love you all,



Steve